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how to grow potatoes inside, successfully (Part 2: potting)
Part 2 continues the success of Part 1, aka overcoming the abject failure of attempt #1
seventh, once the roots seem to be getting a bit out of control prepare to pot.
eighth, buy soil and a big pot. lay out all your supplies on some paper.
note: if you have a minder who does not like dirt all over the floor, wait until they are conveniently away.
ninth, fill pot about half way with dirt. (dirt only: new nerdy plant book says its actually not good to put rocks etc. in bottom of pot)
tenth, take potting candidates from jar. gently separate them out.
eleventh, place evenly around pot filling in dirt as you go. (this is the messy part.)
twelfth, add last of dirt, gently firm up dirt and make sure plants are steady and firmly upright in their new home.
thirteenth, water thoroughly. is best to do this in tub, but not with shower unless you want dirt everywhere. leave overnight.
fourteenth, place newly potted, successfully grown, giant sweet potato plant in its rightful place.
DONE.
Tweet 0 noteshow to grow potatoes inside, successfully (Part 1: roots)
attempt #1 ended in complete, abject failure. but here at basic chores we don’t let basic chores get the best of us.
first and second, repeat steps 1 and 2 from attempt #1. but this time with a sweet potato (for variety).
third, cut off chunks of sweat potato that have sprouted and stick in some water like you would do with flowers.
fourth, when sufficient roots have grown (and the chunks of sweet potato appear to be sufficiently close to rotting and messing up the whole experiment again), break the chuck of potato off from roots.
fifth, lovingly place rooted stems in another container for further root growth. throw away the slimy not-yet-totally-stinky sweet potato part.
sixth, cover roots from light. (no idea if this is necessary / does anything.)
PART 1 is DONE!
Tweet 1 notehow to grow paperwhites (aka how to force paperwhite bulbs)
forcing bulbs to give you flowers in Jan/Feb is a fun way to mess with nature.
first, purchase the necessary items (bulbs, dirt or stones, a bowl) or receive a kit as a gift from some lovely house guests.
remember: these are NOT for eating. don’t forget to remind special helper of this.
second, ignore directions. combine dirt with water and bulbs, preferably in tub or sink. (technically the water is supposed to be added after dirt and bulbs, but only if you’re dirt adverse.)
third, make sure at least a third or more of the bulb is above soil and that soil is damp throughout. if using rocks instead of soil, bulbs should be less than one fourth below rocks and water should be just about level with rocks but not much higher or else you risk rot.
pro-tip: if you add too much water carefully tip container to drain off excess.
fourth, put by window and tell bulbs that you have high expectations for them.
fifth, wait patiently for about a week or two. make sure the soil stays moist but not soggy. (rocks are easier because its just about keeping water at right level)
sixth, enjoy the smellyness
DONE!
Tweet 1 notehow to grow potatoes inside
first, purchase some potatoes. mini-ones are easiest to carry home and to plant later. carelessly put them in a dark cool-ish cupboard. wait however long it take for them to start sprouting.
second, wait some more for good measure. when the sprouts are about hand high, they are ready to be planted.
third, get a jar and put some rocks up to almost the rim and add water to almost the top. put a couple ‘taters on top.
fourth, put jar someplace sorta near light.
NOTE: if you live with another human being or really nosey animals it is HIGHLY recommended to hide jar.
fifth, wait patiently (and add water when it gets low).
sixth, encourage growth by telling potatoes stories about paul bunion.
seventh, receive email from grandmother laughing/mocking at urban farming efforts. go to check on potatoes to confirm that they are not a laughing matter.
eighth, try really hard to not barf when you dump the surprisingly putrid mess in the sink. (if you have a sensitive gag reflex its probably best to go straight to outdoor trash.)
DONE!
Tweet 67 noteshow to install a shelf, the difficult way
first, construct a shelf (but don’t fully assemble it) in another state, preferably one more than 8 hours away.
second, wrap shelf parts in bubble wrap, twine and tape it, bring it in a car, on a plane and in a cab to the final destination.
third, stock on up on sandpaper and other snazzy materials for the construction part.
fourth, do some screwing.
fifth, do some drilling.
sixth, after a full hour of sanding down the not-totally-even shelf ends, see if it fits in the window.
seventh, seriously consider leaving it as is.
eighth, after several more hours of sanding, try out the shelf.
DONE!! finally.
Tweet 14 notes
