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how to hide trash in plain sight (because your trash can may or may not be full)
first, take discarded cabbage leaves and put assorted stuff that should be in the trash on top of them.
second, cover with other discarded cabbage leaves.
DONE!
for help determining when and how to take the trash out see: How to Take the Trash Out PART I and PART II from way back in 2010.
Tweet 15 noteshow to deal with a mouse that is obnoxious and sneaky
first, discover that a mouse has gained entry to the under the sink cabinet.
second, realize that mouse has been using under the sink cabinet as its own personal POOP PALACE.
third, clean out nastiness. the under the sink cabinet is NOT a bathroom.
fourth, stuff all possible holes with steel wool.
DONE.
Tweet 48 noteshow to clean an outside deck
first, make a mess with a bag of chips.
second, wait 45 to 180 minutes, locate a sweeping implement or two.
third, side with the easier option.
DONE!
Tweet 183 noteshow to kill mosquitoes (aka how to deal with an invasion)
first, see a mosquito.
second, grab it out of the air like a bad ass. smush it good.
third, notice that the number of mosquitoes is not decreasing despite best efforts.
fourth, find open window/door. close it.
fifth, bring out the big guns to get mosquitoes hiding out of reach. (note: if you like your shirt, use a dishtowel or cloth napkin.)
sixth, leave pile of bodies on windowsill to scare away other mosquitoes.
DONE!
Tweet 8 noteshow to multi-task in the kitchen
first, select a tv show.
second, place it on some fruit.
third, start the dishes.
DONE!
Tweet 2 notes
